I'm on a journey to read through the Bible in chronological order. Taking it one day at a time, I will read based on a list I found on the internet and blog about what happened, thoughts provoked, emotions conjured, etc. Enjoy!

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Day seventy-seven: Deuteronomy 21-23

Forgive me for not blogging yesterday. I coordinated a blood drive at work all day and was completely wiped out at the end of the day after giving blood myself. Still feeling a bit groggy and tired, but the whole experience was well worth it! In fact I plan to give again in July at Turner Field!

This entire reading was choc-full of humorous little laws and statements that I just couldn't overlook. It might be a bit lengthy, but I promise you won't be disappointed :)

Atonement for unsolved murder is explained in a very simple way--whichever town the body was closest to is responsible to send priests to break a heifer's neck and wash their hands...seems pretty easy, but how in the world do you break a cow's neck? Those suckers are sturdy...just sayin'.

A few others rules are explained, but one that made me smile was one about having a rebellious son. If you have a son that just won't obey you, you take him to the elders and say "This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious. He will not obey us. He is a profligate and a drunkard." Then everyone stones him to death... I wonder how many parents have thought about this, just for a fleeting moment of insanity when their kid has fallen off the deep end. Seems a little strict for disobedience eh?

Then come a whole slew of random rules:
  • return anything a brother drops--very applicable today, anyone seen that $20 I left in the breakroom?
  • men shouldn't wear women's clothes a vice versa--but Trav's basketball shorts are my fav lazy outfit!
  • don't plant 2 types of seed in one vineyard--no idea why this is relevant
  • don't plow with a donkey and an ox yoked together--again, no idea. maybe because they aren't "equally yoked"???
  • don't wear clothes of linen and wool together--because even God had good fashion sense :)
  • any cloak you wear must have 4 tassels--again with the great fashion sense
  • any woman who was found to not be a virgin before marriage can be stoned to death
  • if a man rapes a betrothed virgin, he is stoned to death, but if he rapes a single virgin, he has to pay her father and then marry her--can you imagine if this happened now? why on earth would any woman want to spend the rest of her life with someone who attacked her...seems to go strictly against the institute of marriage established by God Himself! Struggling with this one...
  • don't pay God with money earned by prostitution--duh
The discussion of "emissions" has been brought up before and its talked about again in this reading...brings out the 5th grader in me, gotta love it. Basically, anyone who has a (and I'm not kidding the Bible actually says this) "nocturnal emission" must leave the camp, wash himself and not return til morning...

then God talks about pooping--everyone does it, guess He figured it had to be brought up!

"12 Designate a place outside the camp where you can go to relieve yourself. 13 As part of your equipment have something to dig with, and when you relieve yourself, dig a hole and cover up your excrement. 14 For the LORD your God moves about in your camp to protect you and to deliver your enemies to you. Your camp must be holy, so that he will not see among you anything indecent and turn away from you." So basically, God walks around in the camp and doesn't want to step in your business, so pretty please dig a hole and cover it up.

1 comment:

  1. This is absolutely great. I'm truly enjoying reading through all this! While I'm confused about all the stonings, and one day I hope we can sit at God's feet and Him explain all of history, I am still learning about all the laws of the Old Testament. Thank you for being faithful in your readings and sharing all of this!